The Single Story

CHAPTER ONE

Let’s talk about relationships.

This is a topic my friends and I love to discuss on a regular basis. We’re women; it's just how we operate. We like to be informed, talk about feelings, and yes, we're guilty of over analyzing. I'm not an expert on the issue. However, when a group of girls get together, you can imagine how quickly stories are shared. Break ups, proposals, heart-ache, and moments of bliss. Everyone has relationship history. Everyone has a personal library of relationship stories. My past relationships have come from all genres and have varied in length. Some flings are short and end quickly while other relationships are like the favorite novel that you continue to read and re-read in hopes that the ending will suddenly change. None the less, both present and past relationships should be valued because they reveal the route a person had to travel in order to arrive at their current state of being. Stories are meant to be treasured. They are meant to be remembered.
I'm at the age were the conversation of marriage is common and it no longer begins with "When I grow up...". Some friends have already tied the knot. Some are engaged and planning their ideal wedding. And few of my girlfriends are anticipating a proposal in the near future.  For my friends who are in this stage of your life, you all know that I am truly tickled for you and I'm so happy that I've been able laugh and cry with you as your most recent story continues to be written! There is nothing more pleasing than seeing a friend with a glowing smile upon their face. 

But then there's me
and I feel like...

But in reality I'm like these Chipettes...

Put your hands up! Being single really isn't as terrible as some people think. In fact, it can have several advantages. 

It's a time to learn about yourself and discover what qualities you desire most in a future relationship. Prior to becoming invested in a relationship, I believe it’s important to be confident in who YOU are. What are your likes and dislikes? How do you live your life? What is your own moral code? What makes you tick? What are your goals, dreams and aspirations? Living single gives you the freedom to discover yourself, which in turn will you help you decide what you want in a partner. Once you have achieved personal balance from within, you will be able to give out love and take it in much more gracefully. Enjoy the freedom that you get as being single! That's one of its prime benefits. Don't sacrifice your personal happiness for acceptance! Rather, be patience and hopeful that you will one day meet someone who embodies the qualities you desire.

Making yourself emotionally available is the first step in meeting new people. This part is difficult because it requires you to be vulnerable and step outside your realm of comfort. By entering situations with an open mind and the courage to be transparent, it allows others to feel at ease in your presence. Life isn't about being perfect...it's about being real.

One day I hope to change my single story to one titled 'happily married' but until God reveals the plot of the next novel in my life I plan to approach new opportunities with an open mind, a humble heart, and an eagerness to live fully, give freely, and love without reservations.

 -jpr-